Sunday, 14 May 2006

What I cant Blog about on Mothers Day
Muse : Not this post Dear. Didnt you read myTerms and Conditions ,when you
clicked Accept.

Self : Well I didnt. I thought I could trust you. And anyway who reads the
Terms and Conditions before clicking Accept on the Net?

Muse : Well in page 23 para 3 covers the Topics on Mother's Day
And it reads

A. "Its suggested that you do not blog about maternal mortality on Mothers
Day. Mothers Day is about the mothers who are alive, not mothers who die in
the process of giving birth."
If you desire to blog about Indian maternal mortality scenario, of a mother
dying Every 5 minutes in India. You are expressly forbidden to mention that
our rate is worse than that of China, Sri Lanka and even Bangladesh. You are
instructed to mention that our rate is better than that of Pakistan. And you
are expressly forbidden to point out that it would become a matter of
concern if Pakistan killed 105120 women every year."

B."You should not blog about the Earning Working Mother's and wonder if she
would have some problems. You are also not allowed to blog about Non-Earning
Working (homemaker) mother's and wonder if she would need financial
assistance. You are of course allowed to blog and mock the concept of
equality for earning women when they want maternity benefits. You are not
allowed to blog about paternity benefits or the concept of father taking
care of the child"

C."You are not allowed to talk about respect and women. People respect their
moms. And some may respect just their moms and not other women, because,
duh, these other women are not their moms. You are of course encouraged to
point out that as long as one respects their own mother, their quota for
respecting women is completed."

D."You are not allowed to point out that some abuses towards women would be
termed as an insult if its used against our mothers. The point of abuse is
to insult."

E."You are also not allowed to talk about perception of women, like
stupid,irrational,cunning,deceiving, etc. And wonder if it would be ok, if
someone attributed these to your mother. The point of perception, is to
imagine, what we want to be the truth, is the truth."

F."You are encouraged to compare mother with motherland. But expressly
forbidden to say civic sense and environmental concerns, if absent, is an
abuse of motherland"

G.You are welcome to write about the pains of motherhood. But please do not
vulgarise it by wondering on the magnitude of pain or by mentioning the size
of a vagina and size of a baby. You are expressly forbidden to mention the
lack of healthcare in our country. You are of course welcome to protest
against some doctors who are unethical enough to advise a surgery instead of
normal delivery.

H.You are enthusiastically encouraged to post a beautiful poem praising your
mother or all mothers

I.You are enthusiastically encouraged to post a touching picture of a woman
and child. If thats not possible, you are encouraged to post beautiful
flowers.

J.You are enthusiastically encouraged to blog about any Page 3 star and
their gift to their mother.“

Self : OK. But does it mention anywhere that I cant blog about these clauses

Muse (angrily) : No.

Self : Thanks Muse, and Aaah what else can I say, Happy Mothers Day to my
Mom, my Mother in law, and 3 more women who think of me as their own
daughter.

Happy Mothers Day to the bloggers who are Mothers

and a very Happy Mothers Day to the Mothers of all Bloggers