Dear Aargh

I was too busy studying in college. And for the past couple of years too busy working.Now everyone is asking me about a girlfriend.Its not that I dont want a girlfriend, its just that I am not desperate to have a girlfriend and am not keen on the girls I have met so far. So what do I say to people who think I am a lousy loser because I dont have a girl.

PS : Give me a serious reply and not "tell them you are gay" reply.

Aaargh Advises

Mate heres 12 stuff you can say
and none of them say, hey I am gay.

1."She is in Russia. She is helping the Russian children, after the terrorist attack last year. She was in BBC for half minute last month. Didnt you see her?" Start talking about Russia and the weather there etc.

2."We have split up and I am still recovering." And give a distant look. Write a few sob blogs, and send the links to all your friends.

3."Oh I will have one as soon as she dumps you. “
(Its worth the look on the "friends" face. But you cant tell that to women, unless they are lesbians)

4."Why should I tell you about her?" (Puts the guy on defensive, use it if you dont want a relationship with that person)

5."She is busy with her career and doesnt have time for fun."(Keep it vague)

6."Who needs a girlfriend, would you get a cow for milk." (Dont use it with women around. Otherwise they too will start saying that, and other guys too wont get girlfriends)

7."Statistically its impossible for every Indian to get a girlfriend." And talk about the declining sex ratio and that in many states the child marriage ratio is above 50% You can always use wisedonkey's blog for additional information.(For heavensake unless you want others to avoid you like a plague, dont say it)

8."She is a police officer, so busy."(Thats just for intimidation)

9. "Well she is a coworker so wants to keep it a secret." (Works if you have 15 single women at work not if you have just a couple)

10."She died last month." Look distraught, no questions will be asked. If they dig, mention a long battle with cancer (dont say HIV)

11.“She is a celebrity and thinks if I talk about her, tabloids, will immediately pay you and publish it. She wants to introduce me in a press conference, not through a tabloid.”

12."She is a Saurav Ganguly fan and has kept a vrath. She will come out with me only when Saurav scores a double hundred in a Test match against a strong team and proves his critics wrong."

Any other suggestions???

Aargh Diaries is a fictional series.

Suggestions

Samy : " My girl friend is an agent with RAW..SO...now you see her, now you dont!!"the asker will run a mile:))
neways , ppl always accept what we say with conviction, isnt it??